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10 Things VGG Needs to Succeed
Shortly after a high-powered board meeting of the top Video Game Geek executives - except for stueynet, he’s away or something…& there are no other executives. Basically, there was one person at the meeting, myself, & God help me I think I may be drunken again.
Wishbane Made Prime Minister of Canada
After finishing my French cruller & double-double ( that’s coffee to you non-Canadians ), I rolled up the rim on my Tim Horton’s coffee cup ( where wonderful prizes are found ), only to discover that I had won the most coveted prize of all - Prime Ministership of our great land.
Society’s Top 10 Names for Gamers
I think it’s important for gamers to know how they fit into their society, & there’s really no better barometer of this than the treasured opinions of our fellow citizens.
5 Game Characters that Suck at their Job
I was wasting time over at Destructoid when I came across this post about game characters that suck at their day jobs. It made me think about how most heroes/oins in pop culture suck at their jobs. Neo was a good hacker but when it came to work he wasn’t exactly up for […]
Retard’s Videogame Vacation
Too bad Wishbane spent all his money & has to live on overdraft & credit cards ( that’s drunks for you ) - now he can’t afford to buy any of the potentially amazing videogames coming out this year. Let’s have a look at some of the great games the dull-witted, unhappy “writer” won’t be […]
VGG Presents the Top 10 Coolest Videogame Weapons
Another day, another top ten list - that’s stupidity for you. Take it from me fellow geeks, alcoholism & mental disenfranchisement are not conducive to creativity.
Cutscene Catastrophe
Back in the day, cutscenes were rendered in CGI, & served to reinforce the plot highlights of what little story ( the dull bits ) piggy-backed along with the game ( the fun bits ). The great thing about them was that on your second play-through ( or your first if you […]
The Future Of Handhelds
One of the persistent problems affecting the longevity of handheld systems is the inability to change the control input design, since the “controller” is permanently bonded to the system. A year or two after launch the software has outgrown the original offerings in most areas, but the gameplay is the same because the […]
VGG’s Top 10 Hottest Videogame Babes - Fighting Game Edition
The top 10 most porkable women in fighting games, as selected by the extremely elderly, drunken & lecherous Wishbane. Yes, I know, every geekblog has a list like this - we’re not here to be original. We’re here to waste some of your time before you resume your search for whatever website you were really […]
Wishbane Rates the Home Consoles
What pernicious & vengeful deity did gamers offend so completely to end up with the current litter of consoles? Your intrepid reporter Wishbane ( as seen on the internet ) rants about investigates the situation with the steely eyed objectivity only the drunken possess.
About Some Games I Sold
Yesterday I went down to my local videogame store ( the excellent Gamecenter, at the corner of Yonge & Charles in downtown T.O. ) & sold a bunch of games, which I’m now going to tell you about instead of writing a real article:
DLC Stupidity - Arkadian Warriors Review ( XBLA )
Guess who paid 800 Microsoft points for Arkadian Warriors - if you guessed me, you’d be right. It’s not that this is a terrible game ( it’s merely average ), it’s more that it was just so obviously not a smart purchase. Why, oh why does stupidity stalk my poor little life, ruining every moment […]
What Ever Happened To Virtual Reality?
This was supposed to be an intelligent article addressing the whole idea of Virtual Reality, a genre which seemed like it was just around the corner in the late 90’s yet now etc, etc. As discussed with Stueynet this was going to be the “money” article which was going to put Geek on the blog […]
The World’s Laziest Blogger
Ah Wishbane, Wishbane - it’s not like there’s anything particularly hard about writing a few lines in a blog every day, but there it is, I am lazy. It’s especially bad considering there are actually a few people reading the geekblog these days, to those few discerning internet adventurers I offer my apologies. You […]
Kidnapped by J6
While investigating the unexplained disappearance of many of the premier ( imaginary video game ) fighters in the world today, your intrepid reporter ( that’s me ) found himself in the clutches of none other than the dreaded ( imaginary Sega video game bad guys ) J6.
Heroic
Yes geek brothers & sisters, I finally finished Halo 3 on Heroic - I’m glad I did it, but as I suspected the Flood showcase level Cortana was a little tedious. I can really do without enemies that don’t die when I kill them times infinity; I get it, they’re space zombies ( so why […]
Bleach!
Yes, I’ve got a new game for my DS & as you may have guessed it’s Bleach, an awesome fighting game from Treasure - I love this game & am unable to express myself in an way intelligently or critically about it, so I’ll just say: Wishbane love game, it name Bleach! Fun time, game, […]
Drunken Halo
Hello fellow geeks, I hope this post finds you well, if not happy - for how can the geeky find happiness in this world of “coolness”, “well-paying jobs” & “hygiene”? Oh well - at least you have this blog, & we love tolerate you; the fact that you don’t as yet technically exist […]
Even More Awesome Stuff On Geek
I just had an email “conference” with the legendary “site admin”, stueynet himself, & while it’s true that he doesn’t actually read anything on the site, he does look at the site from time to time & most importantly works on the site to the benefit of us all - “all” being the hypothetical geek […]
More Random Notes
Instead of a new, hilariously funny article for the site, it’s just more geekblog. I at least have the comfort of knowing no-one actually reads this blog ( including the site admin - proven ), but still, meh.