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Kevin Sussman
United States
Los Angeles
California
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My wife will play Sim City continuously until she is forcibly removed from my computer. It’s problematic because forcibly removing my wife from anything is really not an option. She’s small, but formidable. Ultimately, the only way to get my computer back was to uninstall the game. Ready for some irony? My wife, the woman capable of mastering the complex economic and civic machinations of running a thriving city, is incapable, or rather, unwilling to figure out how to install the game back onto the computer. Sound like a paradox? Then you probably aren’t married. At least not to my wife.
What’s this got to do with Reiner Knizia? Stay with me. Several months ago, I bought an additional computer for my home. And with it, a new game. An economic simulation called Sid Meier’s Railroads. I figured even if my wife was into it, at least its multiplayer, right? Okay, here’s how it played out. She rejected it at first, coldly, and seemingly without reason. She simply refused to try the game. Upon further provocation, she confessed a vague disinterest in the game’s central theme… trains. I reminded her of the transportation aspects of her beloved Sim City! Nothing. She ate some hummus and turned on the TV. Fine, whatever – I enjoyed the game immensely, especially the week I bought it, staying up playing online games until way too late, going to bed with guilty circles under my eyes.
A few weeks later, although the allure of being a Railroad Tycoon was fading, I happened to be playing it when my wife walked by and stood silently by my side, watching as I purchased trains and routed them, upgraded depots and delivered goods, etc. Suddenly, as if a bell had gone off, she demanded I teach her to play. What the?! Cut to:
Months later: I’m now sick of Sid Meier’s Railroads. My wife, who crushes me in the game regularly, plays far more than I do and I’m starting to feel guilty about getting her hooked on Sid Meier’s latest cyber-crack. Its cliché, I know, but I’ve gone and created a monster. More and more of those parts of our marriage where we used to, you know, talk and stuff, are now spent in front of our screens, silently clicking away, together yet strangely (dramatic violin crescendo, please) alone.
Okay, here’s where the board game stuff comes into, uh, play. Not long ago a friend turned me on to BGG and I have since been having a lot of fun learning all about euro-games and discovering how bad Monopoly secretly is. More importantly, I have made it my mission to steal my wife away from her computer games and get her back to reality. Maybe reality isn’t the right word. Get her to join me in the dining room for a little board game action before the carpel tunnel sets in and her computer chair slouch freezes permanently into her once supple spine. Reiner Knizia, where are you?
After doing some spine slouching of my own on BGG for a few days, and hitting some extremely useful lists for this kind of thing (search Tags for 2 player) I made the leap from digital to cardboard. I bribed my wife into checking out a local game store. I can’t remember how I managed that (shoe shopping or yoga was most likely involved; undoubtedly the memory lies deep within my subconscious where it belongs) and the following games are what we came home with.
A. Settlers Of Catan
B. Power Grid
C. Battlelore
I know, I know. Reiner Knizia has nothing to do with any of these games. And, sadly, my wife will also have nothing to do with them. Alright, that’s not entirely true. Surprisingly, she likes Battlelore. Sort of. Without going into too much detail, she felt Settlers was too simple, Power Grid too mathy, and Battlelore too damn long to set up. Yes, I know, get the expansions - use a calculator - set it up before summoning her to the dining room. Don’t you think I’ve tried that? It’s too late. Hummus. TV.
Enter: Knizia.
Ding Dong. Fed-Ex. What’s this? Lost Cities - a card game for two players.
Here’s the thing about Reiner Knizia’s Lost Cities. I avoided it at first, even with its reputation of being “couple friendly.” More to the point, I avoided it because of that reputation. The quintessential “couples” game? I may as well keep going to yoga! Add in the many comments of BGG’ers criticizing how rudimentary it is… a deck of cards with some numbers?! Are you kidding me?! When Civilization III for the PC came out, my wife and I didn’t eat for two days. You want me to bring home a game where the object is to play cards in numerical order?! No chance. Cut to:
Thoughthammer’s March Madness sale. Lost Cities is on sale. And… hopeless romantic that I am, I picked it up. And so as not to be fiscally irresponsible, I also ordered Carcassonne the Castle, and Starship Catan to take full advantage of their flat fee shipping. My momma didn’t raise no dummy. Okay, ready to review the results of my little experiment?
My wife loves Reiner Knizia’s Lost Cities. She will play it any time. Anywhere. We could be on a cruise liner sinking into the Arctic Ocean and my wife might very well suggest a game of Lost Cities. I also love Lost Cities. Not with quite the same fervor necessarily, but I have yet to turn down a game. Starship Catan and Carcassonne the Castle were both a waste of money. I think they’re both good games… especially, Carcassonne the Castle (another Reiner Knizia game incidently) but my wife would rather play Lost Cities thank you very much. Sometimes if I manage to win a match of Lost Cities, I declare “winner chooses which game to play next!” That never works. It’s Lost Cities or the train game or hummus and America’s Next Top Model, or hummus and Iron Chef, or hummus and Law & Order.
I should probably mention that I could still probably get her to play Battlelore, but setting up all those little game pieces… ugh. Don’t get me wrong, I think Battlelore is a richly satisfying game but I’m a grown man for crying out loud – spending twenty minutes setting up my little soldiers gets kinda depressing. Shouldn’t I be going over bank statements or reading the newspaper or something?
Okay. I need to address Carcassonne – the City, a game by Reiner Knizia. First of all, it’s a remake of the hugely popular Carcassone, not a purebred Knizia original. Not buying it? Fine. The real problem, my critical mistake, was introducing it too closely on the heels of Lost Cities’ debut. My wife learned Carcassonne – the City begrudgingly, biding her time until our next game of… well, you know. As for Starship Catan, I went through the rules and a sample game by myself, but the full game remains unplayed. Nice components, but I could just tell. Hummus. Grey’s Anatomy.
So now we’ve got Lost Cities, Railroads the computer game, and an occasional game of the deeply satisfying but somewhat depressing Battlelore. Lost Cities has managed to get us away from the computer to a great extent… and we’re both excited about this new concept of “looking and talking to one another.” But, still I wish the board game situation had a little more “umph.” Whereas my wife is perfectly satisfied to play a game she likes over and over until the universe collapses into itself, I’m all about variety. Which brings me to:
Last week. Oops. Wait… first, let’s cut to:
The future! My wife and I are going on a trip. On a plane. Cross country. Okay, back to:
Last week. Ding Dong. Fed-Ex. What’s this? Some games! For our trip! Small games. Games we can squeeze onto a tray table!
A. Reiner Knizia’s Blue Moon card game.
B. Hive
C. San Jaun card game. (Tray table? I’m gonna try!)
Okay. It had been long enough since Lost Cities’ illustrious debut. It was time to introduce Blue Moon. Just the base game which includes two different decks. It’s like Magic the Gathering, but without buying all those packs of cards. If you are unfamiliar with Magic the Gathering, you most likely do not have or do not know any children under voting age. I cannot play a game which necessitates buying packs of cards. Call it dumb pride if you will, but as I stated earlier, I already feel guilty setting up a game of Battlelore, so going out and buying individual packs of random cards to play with my wife… Who are we kidding? Blue Moon, however, has everything you need to play right out of the box. And guess what? It’s by the Lost Cities guy! See honey?!
Blue Moon is the first game she’s wanted to play more than Lost Cities. Frankly, I was shocked. I wasn’t even sure if I would like Blue Moon myself… from what I’d read, I was afraid there wouldn’t be enough strategy. Now, I’m sure someone at this very moment is whipping up a detailed spreadsheet proving the game’s inferiority – luck of the draw, yada-yada, so keep in mind, I speak only for my spouse and me, but... we find Blue Moon to be loads of fun! So take your big ol’ spreadsheets and spread ‘em! Or don’t. Whatever, I’m easy.
In conclusion… holy moly! We haven’t been playing any video games! We converse and look at each other and stand up straight as homosapiens! By golly, we’re keeping it real, yo! As real as it gets in our dining room! And in a couple of days, we’re gonna keep it real at 35 thousand feet on our way to New York! With Lost Cities, Blue Moon… and San Juan (which I’m waiting for our six hour flight to introduce. Wish me luck.)
So, Reiner Knizia. Genius game designer? Possibly. Saver of marriages? Doing a darn good job so far!
Oh. And Hive. I tried it the other day. Great game! I love it. She’d rather play Blue Moon thank you very much.
Or eat hummus and… what’s on tonight?
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Wow, that was an nice story. Congratulations on "turning" your wife. It seems you put a lot of (strategic) effort in it and probably read one or two geeklists "how to turn my non-gamer friends into gamers" or the like. Seems you made everything right.
And San Juan is a damn good choice as well, in my opinion. Although I don't know it, you might want to take a look at Jambo for your next purchase? Hang in there, dude.
BTW, do you loose/win your games most of the times and/or how does your wife react, when she looses? Just curious. 
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Jeff Kunkel
United States
Smithtown
New York
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I can totally sympathize! I have almost EXACTLY the same situation. My wife loves Age of Wonders II. She'll play it for hours. When she's not playing Age of Wonders, she'd rather watch TV (fortunately we enjoy the same shows). I, however, would like to spend some more face to face time with her with board games. The games I've had success with include:
Blue Moon
Carcassonne:The Castle (which we played so much we're both burned on it now)
Thurn & Taxis
Blokus
DaVinci's Mancala
Polarity
Samurai
Really, a pretty decent list and nice variety of games. I have decent hopes for Elasund:First City of Catan when it gets delivered since she enjoys building and the game is not too long. I've definitely learned that when married to a non-gamer geek (who still enjoys good boardgames), learn what they like and stick to it. My wife enjoys building, tile laying and making patterns. As you can see, all games but Blue Moon fit one or more of those categories (I think she considers Polarity to be a "building" game, but really I think she just enjoys the silly fun of trying to make the magnets balance on their edges). Blue Moon was just a pleasant surprise.
Anyway, well written and great fun to read!
PS: You'll probably find Hive easier to play on a tray table than San Juan. I think may wife would enjoy it, but sadly she has a bug-phobia and it's a non-option for us.
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Mark Farr
South Africa
Sandton
Gauteng
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Fantastic writing, truly brilliant. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this, and not just because your situation so closely resembles my own. Lost Cities was the first game I tried that had my wife asking to play again and again. Since then, she has enjoyed many other games, but I too struggle to get the oomph I want from our gaming. It's not that she is incapable of heavier games, but (much like your wife) she needs to coaxed into getting into them. For me, cool looking box art is enough.
I love the way you handled complexity, or lack thereof, in Lost Cities. While I have great respect for all the smart people here who appreciate all the finer nuances of every game, if we want to work like that we will do just that - work. When we play games, we want to have fun, pure and simple. I don't care if it means we fail to choose optimal moves, or discover perfect strategies. If we are entertained by a "simple" game, that's fine by us.
I am trying to get my hands on Blue Moon (I have it on order). I am encouraged to hear that it was well received by your wife. I have recently got hold of Blue Moon City, but we have yet to play it.
As far as Knizia goes, Lost Cities seems to be the only game of his so far that has grabbed my wife (who seems to have similar taste in games to your wife), although there are many we have yet to try. Carcassone - The Castle did not impress her. Other hits with my wife have been RoboRally (surprisingly, she really enjoyed this one), Wyatt Earp and the Mystery Rummy series. She also thought Balloon Cup was alright. Card games feature strongly here, but that's because they're quick to both explain and play and thus fit nicely into breaks (we both study part-time).
Thank you for a thoroughly entertaining read. I did not anticipate that what appeared to be another "What should I buy?" question would turn out to be so much fun.
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Adam Deverell
Australia
Melbourne
Victoria
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Luckily the only game we have installed on our computer is 101 Solitaire card games. So my wife only plays a couple of games before she tires of it.
I almost never play computer/console games anymore and I thought my wife would have no interest either. Until we went to Spain to visit her sister a few years ago. Enter Crash Bandicoot. Seriously, she played it for a couple of hours a day. Every day. Minimum. Lord knows what's going to happen for the next two months - she's just left for two months with my daughter for a big trip. Sonic must have been part of the pull.
Anyway, I just want to encourage you to get into Reiner Knizia as much as possible, prefeably with friends too. We love Reiner more than any designer.
Reiner games I credit with keeping consoles and computer games out of the house:
Taj Mahal, Modern Art, Carc: The Castle, Ra and Lost Cities. The only other games my wife prefers is Wizard and Alhambra.
Perhaps Reiner should become a marriage counsellor?
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Cynthia Landon
United States
Kissimmee
Florida
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It sounds like Blue Moon City would go over well. We LOVE it - it plays really well with two and also three and four so if by chance you can snag another person or even another couple to come play from time to time, you can still play.
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Nick Warcholak
United States
State College
Pennsylvania
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Even though you don't think Starship Catan will work for you, I would suggest The Settlers of Catan Card Game. It's focus is on city-building with indirect confrontation. It's a fairly deep game and has a robust expansion set to mix things up.
My wife and I also love Lost Cities and Blue Moon. If you can get her interested in the theme at all, I find Twilight Struggle to be an excellent, though longer than most, couples game. It's got the variable power card play of Blue Moon with a much more strategic feel.
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Flix
Germany
Heidelberg
Germany
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Absolutely hilarious!!
Thank for you for this cleverly written, wise insight into a gamer´s matrimony. I think there should be a new topic to contemporary psychology called "The L.C. Phenomenon - Women on Games Tables"
Thank you again, i had a great time reading this....
Flix
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Russell/Karen Morse
United States
Ossining
New York
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Loved your post!
I may not be the best person to advise on the gaming situation with your wife (especially since my husband and I share this BGG account and are definitely Knizia groupies), but I definitely wanted to jump in and second the recommendations for Jambo and Blue Moon City. Both are fabulous games and based on what you've said so far, I think your wife would enjoy playing them.
Some other things that you might want to look into:
Through the Desert is also a fun game, which works fairly well for two players. It's very simple, but you might win your wife over with the cute little camels (I love them! and I'm saving up our geek gold to buy a camel microbadge).
My sister loves Elfenland, but I don't think it works very well as a two player game.
Oh, we recently bought Thurn and Taxis and are loving it. It's a great game and it works well as a 2-player game.
Karen
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Mike Kollross
Canada
Carvel
Alberta
Pew pew pew!!!
I'm a member of the Game Artisans of Canada
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Try Roads and Boats. She likes civ games and R&B is Settlers on steroids. It plays well with two (even solo). You can start playing a game and she'll get sucked in just watching.
If not, hey, now you own Roads and Boats.
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Chester Ogborn
United States
Albuquerque
New Mexico
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You should get Twilight Struggle. :)
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Dave L.
United States
Portland
Oregon
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That story was hilarious and incredibly sad at the same time. Well done!
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Mary Weisbeck
United States
Black Hawk
South Dakota
Even virtual dice hate me!
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Sounds like you should look for a game about Hummus!
Seriously, a wonderfully written story. Good luck with San Juan and have a wonderful trip.
If card games seem to be your wife's thing, we've really enjoyed Corsari and Crazy Chicken (now republished as Drive).
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David Kahnt
United States
Upper Gwynedd
Pennsylvania
It's fun, it's healthy, it's good exercise. The kids will just love it. And we put a little sand inside to make the experience more pleasant.
You know, they say there was a man who jumped from the forty-FIFTH floor? But that's another story...
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Great article!
One of the first games that I bought was Lord of the Rings by Mr. Knizia himself. My wife and I played it many times, never really beating it. She always wants to be Sam though.
I can understand how games affect marriage/relationships.
-DK
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S. Deniz Bucak
United States
Havertown
Pennsylvania
As Above, So Below
My books are forgeries. Nobody wrote them. - Philip K. Dick
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Brilliant! My wife readily agrees to a game over a meal while on a date, but at night after the kids have gone to bed it's hard to pry her away from Law & Order (which has more versions than Carcassonne).
For other two player Knizia's I suggest Ingenious (the travel edition is perfect for playing in a restaurant) or Medici vs. Strozzi.
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Mark Bigney
United States
Cambridge
Massachusetts
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Blue Moon also cures cancer. It's true; I read it in a book I made up.
Excellent story, very well-written. Thanks.
You must have received your writing prowess from Blue Moon. 'Cuz it can do anything.
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Christopher Dearlove
United Kingdom
Chelmsford
Essex
SoRCon 5 2-4 Feb 2012 http://www.sorcon.co.uk
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Mr_Bickman wrote: Now, I’m sure someone at this very moment is whipping up a detailed spreadsheet proving the game’s inferiority – luck of the draw, yada-yada
I'm not the most objective person on this matter here, but actually I think that (in common with several other games) the "it's all luck brigade" generally reveal themselves to have not investigated far enough. You've probably worked it out, but here's the number one item in just about every Blue Moon strategy guide: it can be a good idea to retreat even when not forced to.
Quote: So, Reiner Knizia. Genius game designer? Possibly. Saver of marriages? Doing a darn good job so far!
In the interests of at least my amusement, I forwarded just this paragraph to Reiner.
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Stephen Shaw
United States
Cleveland
Ohio
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Again, I would like to add, taht this was, perhaps, some of the greatest story-telling here on the Geek!! Thanks. My $.02:
Attika
Twilight Struggle
Roma
Oh yeah -- and if your wife likes Lost Cities, try Battle Line
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Thomas Taylor
United States
Pleasanton
California
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On the Knizia note, my girlfriend really likes the Lord Of the Rings game mentioned above, and Winner's Circle.
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Kane Klenko
United States
Ridgeway
Wisconsin
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Before I even got to the Blue Moon part of your story I was going to recommend Blue Moon City. Works great with 2 players and it's even better with more.
Also try: Battle Line, Colossal Arena (with 3 or 4 players), Ingenious, Palazzo, and Ra (works fine with 2, best with 3). I'd be surprised if you both didn't love all of them.
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peter mumford
United States
Somerville
Massachusetts
ceci n'est pas une pipe
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My girlfriend and I have played maybe 40 or so games of Battle Line. Now we are giving it a little rest. It is a perfect game!
Our latest favorite is RA. Great two player game, even though the box says 3-5. There are simple rule modifications here on the geek.
We also love Through The Desert. I think this is a delightful two player game. And we like Tigris & Euphrates, Samurai, they are both outstanding games. Yes, Reiner Knizia can save your marriage!
We also like finding other games to play with. Then we can have a social experience and it is not always me against her.
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Joe Casadonte
United States
King of Prussia
Pennsylvania
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Have you tried getting her to help pick out the next game purchased?
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Scotty Dickey
United States
Brandon
Mississippi
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I would just like to point out that this is Mr_Bickman's first ever forum thread. Get this man an avatar! We need more content like this.
Wonderful story. When my wife gets home, I'll have her read it and comment. I have some suggestions, but she might have more relevant insight.
Scotty
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Jim Leesch
United States
Buffalo Grove
Illinois
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This is one of the best written items I've read in a long time. Good thing there was no soda in my hand, or I'd need a new keyboard. And then it would be hummus. Scrubs.
Thanks!
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Thomas Taylor
United States
Pleasanton
California
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Joe Casadonte wrote: Have you tried getting her to help pick out the next game purchased?
I've tried this, I can't even get her to pick a single game to play, let alone one to buy.
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Posted Fri Apr 20, 2007 10:04 am
